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Preparing for Your Divorce Mediation Step by Step

Divorce Mediation is probably the easiest or at least the less traumatic way of getting a divorce nowadays. Naturally, the very nature of divorce makes the whole situation difficult on many levels, but when it comes to choosing the less painful way to settle your divorce, mediation is usually the way to go. [Related topics: divorce mediation attorneys near me]

If you an your spouse have already decided that your divorce is inevitable and are ready to embark on the mediation journey. It’s highly advised that you start preparing for the process in advance but if this is your first divorce or your first mediation, you may be wondering how and the tips below will take you a long way.

RELATED: At Herzog & Millman Divorce Mediation and Law Group, they’ve been offering family and divorce mediation in Westchester and Manhattan for more than 30 years, striving to help each of you to get the best possible settlement and to avoid the emotional and financial burden of litigation. So before you start “wondering where can I find divorce mediation attorneys near me?” Seek out professional help first for you and your partner but if you’re ready to call it quits, then don’t hesitate to call them at (914) 684-6518 for an initial consultation.


Organize your ideas and prepare to effectively communicate them

Divorce mediation can be easier than traditional divorce litigation. However, many of the issues of a traditional divorce process are still present. For example, the parts often get caught up in a blaming game and have a hard time expressing their ideas as their emotions of frustration and antagonism keep getting in the way.Try thinking things through as calmly as you can prior to your mediation meetings, make a list with your demands and the things your willing to compromise to benefit your children, pets or any other involved parties that are important.

If you have the urge of blaming your spouse for something, reframe it in a way you can express how you feel, what you need, and how the other person’s behavior has impacted you.

Pay attention to what triggers you and learn to control your reactions.

The fact that you’re prepared to communicate your ideas effectively without hurting the other party doesn’t mean your spouse will have the same level of preparation or control, and it’s not uncommon that a spouse tries to provoke the other during the mediation process. Therefore, it is very important that you identify what are the things that can make you lose your temper and learn to keep them at bay.If you can’t avoid those triggers, at least learn to control your reactions to avoid issues that could halt or the process. In spite of how difficult and painful your divorce can be, a temper tantrum will not improve the situation in any way, try to stay calm and collected and wait to cool down before you react to a trigger or make any rash decisions.

Manage your time wisely.

Once lawyers or a mediator is included in your divorce process, time becomes money. If you don’t want to waste any money, then don’t waste time. Plan ahead and get organised so you can spend the time of your mediation sessions discussing the specific topics you need to reach agreement on in an efficient way that leads to favourable solution for both parties.

Try to get used to the awkwardness.

The mediation process may be less difficult and painful than a traditional divorce but it’s still awkward. Sitting down with your ex-partner or co-parent amidst conflict is tough, but your mediator doesn’t expect you to get along or have easy interactions during the process. If you too get used to the idea that there will be a certain level of discomfort and it’s natural given the situation, you’ll be able to overcome that feeling of awkwardness and focus on addressing the issues that need a solution.

Seek help and support

Mediation is draining and the entire divorce process can take a massive toll on anyone, so try and seek for professional help and support from your friends and family. Further, it is highly recommended that during the process you take time to take care of yourself, pamper yourself and be kind to yourself, this can take you a log mile during this harsh journey.

Just in case, the following are a few obvious but still crucial tips you should take into account.

• Make sure all the necessary paperwork is always ready and accurate.
• Make the court-approved parent education program a priority and start them as early as possible during the process.
• Keep close contact with your lawyer and make sure they are up to date with the process to ensure you’ll receive extra guidance and advice from someone you trust.